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Money Mimes.

I saw a mime in San Fransisco once. I was young and it was the first time I've ever seen one of these beasts. I stopped in front of it and I remember it scareing the hell out of me. So I gave it a quarter. When this unholy creature started to move I thought it was going to bite my head off instead it moved for a second then stopped. I knew instinctively what it wanted. But instead of giving it more money I ran. Damn mimes.

Tales From New Orleans by Andrew Gouff.

Once when I was in New Orleans ... Its to painful ... (be strong) ... once when i was in New Orleans visiting relatives ... *sniffle* ... I was walking downtown, heading towards a lovely little beastro I had discovered on a previous visit, I saw *jarring chord* a MIME!!! He was just standing there at first ... not *sniffle sniffle* not noticing me at first, and then ... he SAW ME!!!! He started sauntering up to me ... (pasty white demon) ... and then he did ... *jarring chord* the box, and THEN ... he did the unthinkable ... he put me in the box!!! I couldn't get out, the walls started closing in, i couldnt breath, and then ... I punched the pasty white bastard, and knocked him on his silent assl. HAHAHAHAHA! die mimes die!!!

A Mime's Dream Come True.

One day a mime is visiting the zoo and attempts to earn some money as a street performer. As soon as he starts to draw a crowd, the zoo keeper grabs him and drags him into his office.

The zoo keeper explains to the mime that the zoo's most popular attraction, a gorilla, died suddenly and the keeper fears that attendance at the zoo will fall off. He offers the mime a job to dress up as the gorilla until they can get another one. The mime accepts.

So the next morning before the crowd arrives the mime puts on the gorilla suit and enters the cage. He discovers that it's a great job. He can sleep all he wants, play and make fun of people and he draws larger crowds than he ever did as a mime on the street.

However, eventually the crowd tires of him and he tires of just 
swinging on auto tires. He notices that the people are paying more attention to the lion in the next cage. Not wanting to lose the attention of his audience, he climbs to the top of his cage, crawls across a partition, and dangles from the top of the lion's cage. Of course, this makes the lion furious, but the crowd loves it. At the end of the day the zoo keeper comes and gives the mime a raise for being such a good attraction.

Well, this goes on for some time, the mime keeps taunting the lion, the crowd grows larger, and his salary keeps going up.

Then one day when he is dangling over the top of the lion's cage, he slips and falls. The mime is terrified. The lion raises himself up and prepares to pounce. The mime is so scared that he begins to run around the cage with the lion in hot pursuit.

Finally, the mime starts screaming and yelling, 
"Help, Help me!"

The lion is quick and pounces. The mime soon finds himself flat on his back looking up at the angry lion.

The lion says, "Shut up you idiot or we'll both lose our jobs".

Death Of A Mime By Olive Loaf

Dear Elvis,
In the 80s, a comic entitled "bloom county bablyon," was created by Berke Breathed. The lead character was opus, a penguin of neither size nor inteligence. In one incident, he braved walking a public street at night and came across *gasp* a mime. Little opus braved the villian and beat him to death with an olive loaf, making him the "Midnight Vigilante." I have a copy of this and if you would like, I could scan it, and send it to you for display on your site, as we can all aspire to be "Midnight Vigilantes" of the 90s. thank you for reading my letter,
Maggie Matchin
a name of non-french descent

Dear Elvis,
I apologize for not sending the "Bloom County Babylon" comic like I promised. My scanner was involved in an "accident". After taking 30 mins to warm up, and then freezing, rather than scanning, it was thrown out of my window. My brother (the one who spoiled it into taking its time) picked it up in his arms, crying, and shouting curses at me has begun repairs.  Actually, the whole computer system is either run my satan, or a mime. But then again, in my hell, satan is a mime.
Love and other indoor sports, 
Maggie "Diamond Dog"

Once....I saw a mime

Once.... I saw a mime..... and he did that..... that...... I shudder every time I think of it.... he......... He did the box thing....... and then there was this bomb and it killed my parents.... 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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