REJECTED QUESTIONS
Someone told me that you can get rid of herpes by spreading mayonaisse on them?  Will this really work, or was Boo Radley full of it?
lady sasami
REJECTED
Saw no mayo in ‘fridge. Think that mayonnaise is least of visitor’s problems anyway.

That Snaggletooth was quite fashionable?  Is he available to model our new line of "ho children" clothes?
The Fashion Police
REJECTED
Fashion Police not real member of law enforcement agency. Sent question to the ‘pokey’.

Is there any way that I could get Big Tad's phone number?
lady sasami
REJECTED
Visitor doesn’t appear to understand why Big Tad’s working here in the first place.

hahahaha....you said bippie!!! oh...so my question is....rabies...is it a bad thing or the desease of champions?
big bird
REJECTED
Visitor seems to be amusing self. Felt no need to interrupt.

ooh...look.....iv'e bee posting questions for only 3 weeks and i already have a secret lover (scout finch). My mission for you guys is to track 'scout' down and tell me who she is, okay?.... this is so exciting.
boo radley
REJECTED
Would have taken mission, tape self-destructed before allotted 5 seconds.

Is it just me, or are the rejected question answers funnier than the regular questions?
llarson
REJECTED
Question asked by Llarson.

Hallo, bin ich Bobs bester Freund. Ich komme aus Deutschland. Ich bin ein Devisenkurskursteilnehmer, der zur Schule bei Harvard geht. Ich spreche das deutsch. Bitte bilden Sie Bob nicht verärgert. Ich tat es einmal und jetzt posess I nur 9 Zehen. Herr Bob sagt, daß Sie Schweinefleisch gewürzte Fallhammer sind, die nicht nichts wissen. Ich schrieb diese letzte Meldung. Schrauben Sie nicht mit mir oder Bob.
MR Rob
REJECTED
Offensichtlich hat Besucher Schwierigkeit mit Onlineübersetzer, da das oben genannte nicht korrektes Deutsches ist.

Boxers or Briefs?  Elvis, you look like the kind of guy who would freeball...
lady sasami
REJECTED
Visitor a little too preoccupied with undergarments.

If Llarson keeps asking too many questions could you pummel him about with a catfish for me? and how many questions is "too many", so i can avoid making such a horrendus mistake.
big bird
REJECTED
This many.

Mr. lardlumps and big tad just showed me their bippies, and now you've scarred me for life!!! I'll se you i court.......can't.....sleep.......ugh!!!!!
kwestionman
REJECTED
Wanted to have funny lawyer answer for question, discovered that lawyers aren’t very funny in the first place.

a lardlumps limric

mr. lardlumps is a fatty,
his cloths are stretched and ratty,
his butt cheek's so big,
it engulfed a pig,
a squished it right down to a patty.
llarson
REJECTED
Visitor forgot question mark, oh and question is from Llarson.

Well Well Well so its you again you whats down
Big hat flip
REJECTED
Wanted to answer strange ‘English-as-a-second-language’ question, figured visitor was deported by now anyway.

boo radley
For a change of pace, i feel it would be fun to put my question in the name box and my name in the question box. Is this a good idea?
REJECTED
No, it isn’t.

Dear Snaggletooth, Why does it take so long to have questions answered here? I'm 98 years old, man! (99 years old in May) Even tho I'm probably not gonna die, if simply for the fact that I'm pure evil, I don't have time for dilly dallying. Chop chop!
Tahmeekah Lahsheekah
REJECTED
Snaggletooth has left the building.

Yesterday, I was driving in my Impalla, and I noticed my little 7 year old brother was in the park with some old granny.  As I looked closer, I noticed that it was not an old hag, but it was the king of pop himself, Micheal Jackson.  Should I be worried?
lady sasami
REJECTED
Fearful of child molesting pop stars of indeterminite ethnicity.

I think that you should bring back AESOP... that was alot of fun.  Also, what happened to the I HATE MIMES page.  That was fun... and the Hot Pokers Anonymous
PsyCkoStaRZ
REJECTED
Visitor obviously hallucinating.

could you give llarson this package for me? don't mind the ticking..... NO! dont open it!!!!!....i...want...it.
to....be..a surprise, yes, thats it! so tell him he can't open it until he is alone! thanx.
robwerto
REJECTED
Question blew up in face.

no, push ME to send question.
llarson
REJECTED
Visitor pushed wrong button.

do we get a chance to answer the questions that snaggletooth asked us in response to our questions? If so, my answers are...

1.not anymore, after the lawsuit
2.you'd be grumpy too if you lived in a trash can and everyone around you had the iq of a 3 year old.
3.oscar is 'special', now go have a cookie or somthing.

big bird
REJECTED
Visitor answered own questions.

Who is the guy with the afro?  Afros scare me. I need some cookies....do you have any? Cookies are yummy
Jennmabobs
REJECTED
Question got caught in hair.

will there be a linchin' for all the people that asked for their pic on the visitor page, and then stopped coming? cause i think im the man for the job.
monkee
REJECTED
Unable to retrieve question hanging in tree.

you cant fool me! lardy and thadius don't have bippies!
liars!!!!!! im telling!
Anonymous
REJECTED
Visitor is a tattle tale.

Hey snaggletooth..., Remember me? I have no remorse... Wanna toke on the bowl?
CarNut
REJECTED
Rolled question up and smoked it.

Do u like men?
Brian
REJECTED
Question too Brian-ish.

Snag your a fag you snaggy wagg wag maybe you should twag and get in a bag so your brain can lag and frag my zag mo mag bo bag fe fi fo fag mizag mi mo mag dag wag sag hag jag kag nag mag bag vag
blag
REJECTED
Visitor forgot question mark.

I like u snaggle tooth
Gay Boy
REJECTED
Visitor forgot question mark, oh, and is GAY.

What are "Bippies" anyway? What if we WANT to see the bippies? Do girls have bippies? If so, tell me where they are so I can look at mine.
Bailey
REJECTED
Too many bippies at once.

I have been sending letters to a girl using carrier pigeons to deliver my notes.  Trouble is, I barbecued my pigeon last night.  How can I send her mail now?
Guido
REJECTED
Bird stories banned by Snackwurst.

oh, pooh! pooh on all of you!
Anonymous
REJECTED
Anonymous visitor probably Guido's pidgeon.

I have chewing gum stuck to my nosehair.  I could use a hair dryer, but my friend says sticking a working hair dryer up my nose would make my head blow up.  What should I do?
Wild Bill
REJECTED
Advice columnists not experienced in this scenerio, yet.

zwadawa! punkis stupi dmus ican didontli kitatal l!
i can;t belive that guy is actually the singer!
REJECTED
Question too rowdy.

I know you are holding back on me... Which one of you is Bad Adviceman?
adylay asamisay
REJECTED
Wackyadvice confused with money making web page.

dear snaggletooth, can i have a cookie?
i.eat.crayons
REJECTED
Visitor used crayons & cookies in same question.

Take shelter all ye faint harted! Tonight we will storm the fortress and lay seige upon the onionheads! Oh, ye porfessionals of little faith! Tonight you dance with lucifer himself!! All you who seek refuge in the lord, join me on my quest, for there is none nobler. Grab a pitchfork, a torch an axe and follow!!! Tonight we march on twards victory, twards life!!! YES! Beware, you demonic hell-creatures, you vessils for wackyness, beware! Live today, for tonight.......you die.
boo radley, keeper of all things good and holy
REJECTED
Couldn't figure out if this was a pat on the back or a threat.

Dear Snaggletooth, I am a professional man whore, but I am really not a man, but a woman inside a little boy's body that is infected with rabies, and has soap stuckl in his molars.  I really have to pee, too.  Will you please play "Where is my Mind?" for me?
Brand... eh hem, I mean, uhh, Jennifer the Man Whore
REJECTED
Man whores banned from site along with mimes in 1999.

Have you seen my mommy?
Whinny Hopalong
REJECTED
Question too accusatory.

Where have all the cowboys gone?
Whinny Hopalong
REJECTED
Question too mangey.

Why does the chinese kid in my social studies class look at me funny?
Whinny Hopalong
REJECTED
Question too ethnic.

Can I answer questions?
Whinny Hopalong
REJECTED
Waited for visitor to answer question.

I think I may be drunk. Am I drunk?
Whinny Hopalong
REJECTED
Trying to keep Simian on her 12 step program.

Disillusion #1

Then i saw it.....it the majikal what that embodies all....the crayon of fate, the lunghold of mystery and doom. It saw me and for a moment there was bliss....a blue bliss like none other, and a crown of nothing......, but that moment passed like so much wind and half digested corn. It looked at me ant i staired back at everything and nothing alike. In one swift movement i found myself. I found myself embedded amongst the hats and chilli dogs, the crayola god that smiles upon the bleak and spouts propaganda to the moon. The nine that soon becomes ten and is once again three. It was all there plain as day, blue as grass, and so real. I could feel its eyes upon me, though i knew it had no eyes. It seemed however to be looking at me. Pressing on into the future only to leave me like so much used ointment in the sands of yesterday, degraded and deframed. Left to the wolves, the angry mobs of words...

It couldn't be IT could it? I stood mouth agape, the land i stood on became nothing but the heavens......i was home. The heavens showed me my home, the steel and darkness, yet i was pleased.
Tardus
REJECTED
Question WAY too confusing.