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Dear
Snaggletooth, Please tell me why your co-employees suck so bad at German.
I translated their messages at the top of the page and got this: "Now,
now, don't cry like a very small dogdog dog, Elvis. What could more better
than being Bavarian (aside from drinking like a Bavarian)?" "Oh I dunno,
I've always thought it would kinda cool to a porn star?" "mine sweet lord!
Which AR we going to we? How going in the tail we, how to fixed?!? are!"
Pornographiestern? Forget to attachment the mail server, we must Jason
regulate! And when I mean embarrassment, I mean embarrassment! Ah GET the
dwarves interns to fixed it. "
Dear
Snaggletooth, Well, well well.......i want to know if you can tell me where
these "porfessional advice" people get off not answering questions......or
is this YOUR fault snaggletooth???? you people think your special, don't
you???? You should be ashamed of yourselves!!!!! There are starving children
in africa who's only nourishment is the wackyness of this site and you
just "dont feel like updating...." you disgust me! What if the president
just "didn't feel like being a good leader???? o.k.....bad example, but
what if the chocolate waffle factory just didn't feel like producing chocolate
waffles????? Or if the liquer store just "didnt want" to sell jim beam???
what then???? now i want you to think about what youv'e done to everyone!!!
i cant
hear the site.......i cant smell the site.....i cant feel the site......i
cant taste the site....i cant know the site......i cant love the site.....i
cant hate the site......i cant want the site....i cant follow the site....i
cannot lead the site into a new tommorow.......i cant trust the site.....i
cant free the site....i cant be the site....i cant find the site trapped
in a box in my backyard....i cant bast in the site's light...i cant eat
the site......i cant play poker with the site and win....i cant play poker
with the site and lose....i cant ask the site to go to a movie with me
and pay for its popcorn.....i cant settle down with the site and have little
sites of my own.....i cant harm the site...i cant feed the site...i cant
pick the site out in a crowd....i cant talk to the site and belive its
listening....i cant give the site a high five....i cant wonder what the
site is thinking, because it probably isnt thinking....i cant tell the
site it is doing good on its homework, or that it has room for improvement
in math....i cant call the site collect and save it a buck, or perhaps
two......i cant tell the site to shut up, i'm trying to sleap....i cant
give the site my hamburger and say i didnt want any tomatoes.....i cant
spill something on the site's shirt and apologise, or offer to replace
the soiled one.... i cant ask the site if he wants fries with that.....i
cant save the site from quicksand....i cant tell the site to jump and it
cant say "how high?".....i cant rub snow in the site's face.....i cant
take the site whitewater rafting.....i cant study the site in its natural
surroundings and monitor its behavior.....i can however see the site, and
the site is funny. good work, guys.
i have
been sleeping with my bandmate, lets call her "ms. j.", for some time and
her boyfriend, lets call him "mr. j", does not seem to mind and is verry
suportive of our torrid love afair (hes usually hanging around while im
making passonate love). Then one day i was told that mr. j. yelled out
my name while in bed with ms. j. What should i make of this?
we
have split personalities
Dear
Snaggletooth, i'm allergic to saying allergic twice.
Dear
Snaggletooth, i wish i were an oscar mayer weiner.....for that is what
i'd truely love to be....for if i was an oscar mayer weiner......then everyone
would fall in love with me.
Dear
Snaggletooth, Should I give in to him?
Dear
Snaggletooth, How's Arthur doin'?
Dear
Snaggletooth, what would you do for a klondyke bar?
Dear
Snaggletooth, since you are my hero heres my question....is it possible
to eat with your nose?
ive
done it!!!! i've developed a way of eating yogurt with your EYES!!!!! i'll
make millions! so, who wants in on this miracle and whats the best way
to market this?
Dear
Snaggletooth, i regret to inform you that you have colon cancer. I will
have to ask you to please exit the living world imediately.
Dear
Snaggletooth, is it true that Elvis is your father and your his illegitimate
child? i mean...come on, doesn't anyone else see the resemblance?
Dear
Snaggletooth, Can you possible get that hott granny Tahmeekah Lahsheekah
to go out with me again?
Dear
Snaggletooth, Is there a difference between my favorite ions, and Poppin'
Fresh?
I was
cruising down the street in my Impalla, and I saw Carnut toking up for
the 702 time today, and I was wondering if it would be possible for smoke
to come out of the bullet wound if someone shot him in the lungs, just
like in Scary Movie?
I'm
telling you, I was good for the economy AND I WAS NOT EVER INVOLVED IN
WATERGATE! Is there any chance that I could hook up with Billy Clinton?
Okay..
you can't lie to me... WHERE IS THAT _____ FORMERLY KNOWN AS BadAdvicemam
HIDING?
Just
so you know, Jason, If I had still been alive, I would have funded you
presidential campaign. Nobody really likes George "dub-ya" Bush anyways.
Jason:
Whoever told you that green was the "in" color this season was, totally
on drugs.
Here,
lick this.......DON'T QUESTION WHAT IT IS! JUST FREEKIN DO IT........hurry.
Dear
Saggletooth, Hello.....come bask in the glow of splee.
YOU
WANT THIS! DON'T YOU?!??!?!!!
Who
dresses like taft? I hafta know or else........stuff'l happen.
Are
those roller skates? THOSE ARE ROLLER SKATES!!!! WHO HOO!!!
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